Please take a moment to say a prayer for Kim's step-dad and her whole family.

He was experiencing some chest pain yesterday so he went to the ER. They did an EKG and it came back abnormal. He was admitted and they are going to do a stress test today. Her mom made it seem like it was a GERD issue and not a heart issue, but right now, we don't know.

Any prayers would be appreciated.

Labels: family

This weekend Kim is in Emerald Isle for a girls' weekend with nine other ladies. So, I decided to pack Palmer up and head to Alamance County to have him hang out with his cousins.

Friday night. we spent some time at grandma's house (We didn't get to play the Wii.) hanging out with Jalen. Then, after grandma had given the boys their baths for the night, we headed to the Alston house to put the boys to bed.

This morning, Constance, my sister, had to work and Joel, my brother-in-law, had basketball practice. He asked Jalen if he would rather go with him to basketball practice, or stay at the house and play with Palmer. He chose the latter. So, I got to take care of two kids for the majority of the morning and early afternoon.

The interesting part is that the difference in the ages of Palmer and Jalen is roughly the same as the difference in the ages of Palmer and our Baby Numero Dos. So, hanging out with these two was sort of a preview of what life might be like with our second child is Palmer's age.

Overall, it wasn't that bad. I think I managed it quite well. After Constance and Joel had left, we played inside for awhile. At first, I tried to maintain some state of order, but soon I gave up and decided that a mess was inevitable and we would just have to clean up at the end of the day.



Later, we had a snack and after that I started thinking about lunch. I decided to be brave and take the boys out for lunch. I had decided to take them to CiCi's for some pizza. This had potential to get ugly because we were pushing nap times, but it turned out great. The worst part was the ride there, when I heard "Are we there, yet?" several times. The boys behaved great and both ate really well.



I did manage to lock us out of the Alston house. So, when we got back from lunch, nap times were pushed even further back because we had to play outside until Joel got home. We had a good time playing with Jalen's "roller coaster" and we even had a visit from a neighborhood dog.





Once Joel got home, we got the boys inside and down for nap time, which they were resistant to take part in. At that point, my life with two kids experiment was over.

Like I said, it wasn't that bad. I don't think for a minute that a few hours is indicative of what it will truly be like with two kids, but at least it was a glimpse.

You can see all of the pictures from our trip to the Alstons' here.

What did you do this weekend?

Labels: family

A few months ago, shortly after finding out that Kim was pregnant with our second child, we decided to plan a vacation. We wanted to go on one last childless get-a-way before baby number two arrived. We assumed that it would not be that difficult to find childcare for one kid for a few days and that it would be much more difficult to find childcare for two children starting next year. So, this was sort of our last chance for several, maybe twenty, or so, years to get-a-way without any children in tow.

Well, here we are a mere seventy-two hours from our projected departure and we are still not sure who is going to be watching our son. Now, we are not completely unprepared. We have childcare lined up from the time he gets out of day care on Monday afternoon until we return on Thursday evening. The problem is that we do not have any definite plans from the time we leave late Friday night until he gets dropped off at day care on Monday morning.

Our original thought was that my family would/could watch him over the weekend, but that assumption seems to have been wrong. My mom's health is unpredictable. She has some intermittent back problems. So, she can't be relied upon because on bad days she can barely walk. My younger sister does not do overnight with children, which per her words, "is one reason she doesn't have any children of her own, yet." I get that. So, she is watching Palmer on Thursday until we get home. My older sister has two kids of her own and she and her husband have work and coaching scheduling conflicts. So, they are not an optimal choice either. We've been trying to work out a good plan with my sister around her work schedule, but it has not been that easy.

So, here we are. Stuck. That assumption that "it would not be that difficult to find childcare for one kid for a few days" has not been all that true. Or, maybe we just have not asked the right people. I'm making another assumption, but I bet there are some people out there that are saying, "All you had to do was ask." So, I am asking.

Would you be interested, willing, and able to watch Palmer anytime this weekend?

Labels: family, travel

The folks at NOOMA have put out another video, and they are again doing a free preview on Facebook. It should be available until 1PM on Wednesday, but I would go now and check it out. You can go here to see it.

I think I have seen all of the NOOMA videos and this one is near the top, if not the best one.

Here's what they have to say about it...

We didn’t have anything to do with our birth. We are all here because some woman somewhere gave us life. Her pain, her effort, for our life. And when a mother gives like that to a child, she is showing us what God is like. But sometimes this part of God’s nature is overlooked. A lot of us are comfortable with male imagery for God. But what about female imagery for God? Is God limited to a gender? Or does God transcend and yet include what we know as male and female? Maybe if we were more aware of the feminine imagery for God we would have a better understanding of who God is and what God is like.

Let it be known that my mother and the mother of my children are by far the best two women on the planet. They don't make words to describe how much I love them.

Labels: church, family, nooma, video

If you didn't get it from the last post, we're having another baby.

Labels: baby, family, video

Not long after our son, Palmer was born, I was talking with an older friend, who happens to be the father of four children. I was talking to him about the way things were going at our house since Palmer had been born.

I told him how having a baby was not nearly as earth shattering as I had anticipated. There was definitely a lot more to consider when trying to leave the house. There had definitely been an increase in the amount of stuff in our house. As well as a decrease in the amount of sleep, but overall, things were not all that different. If Kim had something she wanted to do, she could leave Palmer at home with me, and vice versa.

I'll never forget his response. It went something like this...

Yeah. Having one kid is a breeze. There are two of you and one of him. You can double team him. The more difficult thing is when you add a second kid. Then, you have to play man-to-man defense. Then, it is all over when they out number you. You are playing zone at all times and there are always holes in the defense.

Well, Kim and I are starting to practice our man-to-man defense in preparation for next year's March Madness. I know it's early, but we feel like we will need all the practice we can get in because Palmer's punching bag, i.e. our second child, is due to enter the chaos that is our lives in mid-March 2009.

Answers to some questions you might have...

• 9 weeks.
• Decent, more nauseous than last time.
• 22 months.
• Nah, that's what we wanted.
• It could happen.
• Most likely.

Questions you may have asked...

• How far along is Kim?
• How is Kim feeling doing?
• How far apart will your kids be?
• Wow, that's pretty close together, isn't it?
• Will you name this kid Sidney if NC State wins the ACC Tournament on the day it's born?
• Are you guys crazy?

Ready or not, here we go.

Labels: baby, family

I posted another video of Palmer playing on his blog.

Go check him out.

Labels: blogosphere, family, video

On July 4, my brother-in-law and two of his cohorts released a hip-hop album. Their self titled album, 154, is an EP with six tracks. It is currently available in the iTunes Store, on Amazon.com and in a few independent music outlets. You can check out their myspace page to hear a few tracks and to see the list of stores selling the album.

In the past few weeks since their album dropped, they have been getting some air play on WKNC 88.1. DJ Nominal even had them in the studio for an on-air interview during his time slot. He podcasts his shows. So, you can check it out here.

I asked Joel, aka JP Flowz, for an exclusive quote for my blog, but he was being modest. He's still working on his PR skills. I did get this out of him, "We've got some old school, some new school, and some tracks that will make you bob your head." Personally, I like North Cak and Work It Out does make me bob my head.

So everyone go check him out and show him some love. If you end up buying a track or the entire album, he has asked me to ask you to leave a review.

Do any of you even listen to hip-hop?

Labels: entertainment, family, music

Palmer has been developing a lot of new skills recently. Head over to his blog and see a video of him in action.

Labels: blogosphere, family, video

My lady is. That's who. In case you missed it, Kim is now twittering, or tweeting, if you prefer. Give her some love. You can follow her at @kimberlymsmith.

If you aren't on twitter, you should be.

Labels: family, twitter

This kid is going to be breaking hearts and taking names (and probably numbers), as soon as he learns to write.



Palmer's Aunt Leslie is learning use her fancy pants camera, i.e. she took a photography class. I guess we'll let her use Palmer as a guinea pig, as long as she gets in a few good ones, like this one.

Good job sis.

Labels: family, photography

My dad was the type of guy that worked on cars, built stuff out of wood and fixed things around the house. He also worked in the public. So, he knew lots of people. Around the house, if he didn't know how to fix something, there was a good chance that he knew someone that did.

Last week I really missed my dad. See, my dad passed away in January of my freshman year of college. And, prior to that I didn't take the time to absorb much of the knowledge he had gained over the years. In high school, I wasn't into fixing cars and building stuff. I was self absorbed and into my sports.

Now, ten years later I am still into sports, but I am into working on my car and I really like building stuff. I have sort of taught myself most of what I know about those things. The area that I feel the most inept in is stuff around the house. I don't know much about what makes for a good refrigerator, how to fix leak pipes, and I know nothing about why my air conditioner won't condition the air.

See, on Tuesday, my wife called me at work to inform me that the AC wasn't working. I tried to help her over the phone, but I was pretty much just guessing. When I got home, I took a look at it and got it to blow air, but it was warm air. We had a couple people come look at it and both people sort of said the same thing. The problem is that I didn't know much about what they were talking about.

This is where I missed my dad. He would have known what they meant when they talked about coils, capacitors, pressures, and tonage. I made some phone calls to get some advice, but it was not like having my dad there to discuss options.

Luckily, Kim's dad was in town and he helped out a lot. So, a big thanks goes out to him.

In the end I am getting a new AC unit put in, which I think is the right decision, but I would feel a heck of a lot better if my dad were here to say it is the right move.

Labels: family

Obviously, I haven't been blogging. So, I thought I would update you all with what I've been doing instead.

Work Stuff
Over the past few months, my job has gotten significantly more demanding. I have went from being the sole tester on a project that no one, or almost no one, cared about to being the unofficial team lead for the testing team on a project that a lot of people, including our CEO, care about.

This shift has made my works days seem a lot shorter, almost too short, as I often feel like I don't have time to get done all that needs to be done. My days have been filled with tasks like planning and conducting meetings, training new team members, infrastructure design and setup, among other things. I am being called upon by the managers to make sure everything that needs to get taken care of gets taken care of.

I have to say that even though I am doing work well beyond my job desription without getting paid for it, I am more satisfied with my job now than I ever have been. So, all the time that I used to have in my work day to blog has been filled with... work.

Family Stuff
It is no secret that I am the proud father of a ten month old little boy. It is also not a secret that I am the proud husband of my wonderful wife, Kim. Well, if you were unaware, being a husband and a father takes effort.

My wife is at home all day with our son, Palmer. So, I've been making more of an effort to take care of him when I get home. This means I spend less time on the computer and thus, less time blogging.

Also, recently Kim has started working from home. So, in the evenings when I am home and doing my best impersonation of a daddy, she is often on the computer working. She is working for a local company doing medical transcription from home. Thus far, it is working out well. I am working through my withdrawal from the internet. However, we are thinking of purchasing a Mac Book.

Other Stuff
Those are the main reasons my blogging has fallen off, but there are a few other contributing factors. Some of those are Twitter, my bike, reading, yard work, and fantasy baseball.

If I were more disciplined, I would set aside some time to blog in my schedule, but the problem with that is that I don't have a schedule. Maybe one day I will make one of those, but for now, I hope to post at least once a week.

I miss you.

Labels: family, work

This is my new desktop at work. Kim's not a huge fan of this picture. I think she laughed right before it was taken. I love this picture, for the same reason she doesn't like it. It brightens my day when I see it.

Here are a couple more photos of all of us...




You can see the rest of the photos from our most recent trip to Portrait Innovations here.

Labels: family

Kim and I have read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman1 and we know many other people who have also read it. I feel like some people treat that book as the fifth gospel, but I've never really connected with it.

I think he makes some good points about people feeling loved through different "languages". I have just never found any one of the "languages" he illustrates that accurately describes what makes me feel loved.

I'm not the most emotionally connected person. So, it's not like I the answer that Chapman was missing. It has always been difficult for me to put a finger on what it is that makes me feel loved. Taking from the book, it's sort of "Acts of Service, it's sort of "Quality Time", and it's sort of "Gifts".

All that said, last night something happened that made me feel more loved than I have in a long time. For those that subscribe to the gospel of Gary, my love tank was filled.

Last night Kim and I made a stop between Chipotle and home. We stopped by the home of another SAS employee to check out a refrigerator they had posted on our electronic bulletin board. The fridge was only about four years old, but white, and their new kitchen was going to include black appliances. It was a nice fridge and a great deal.2

We drove away from the home where we saw the fridge with the expectation that we would talk it over and let them know our final decision today. On the ride home, we went over the pros and cons of buying it. I admitted that one of my selfish reservations was that if we bought the refrigerator, we would not have the money for me to buy a bike.

It was at this point that my wife blew me away. I know she loves me. I never question that, but I don't know if her love has ever been so apparent as when she said, "I don't want us to buy a new refrigerator until you buy a bike." That might not seem so significant, but I know she would really like to have a nicer refrigerator and the fact that she is not just willing to, but wants to set aside her desires for mine makes me feel loved.

So, the profound "a-ha" moment for me is that I think I have discovered my love language. I think my love language is sacrifice. It makes a lot of sense in relation to how Chapman describes how to figure out what your love language is. He suggests that most people show love in the way that they want to be shown love. I feel like I try to show Kim I love her by setting putting her first a lot the times. It makes sense now that her doing that for me moves me in such a way.

There is something profound in there that points back to my faith. I just don't have to expound on it, right now. Plus, this has gotten pretty long. If you made it this far, thanks for accompanying me on the journey.

In conclusion, my wife is amazing. I am blessed to have her. I love you schnucky-bumpkins, sweetie-pie, post-it note, pumpkin'!3

1. back I was unaware that there was a "Men's Edition". Has anyone read that?


2. back Kim and I have been talking about buying a new fridge since moving into our house about a year and half ago. We've even saved money dedicated to buying a new fridge. So, this was a great opportunity.


3. back Like I said, I'm not very emotionally connected. I can't say all these heartfelt things without making a joke. We'll call that a defense mechanism.

Labels: family

Can you really lose your voice, if you don't know how to talk?

Palmer has been coughing and crying so much that he has lost his "voice". He still makes sounds, but he has lost his upper octaves. If you've never noticed before, babies make a lot of different noises, most of which are high-pitched. Well, now every noise Palmer makes reminds me of Amanda Overmeyer.

Here's a little clip of "Sick Palmer":

Labels: baby, family

This afternoon my wife is heading down to the beach for a girls weekend. She is getting away for a few days of girl talk, girl movies, and probably toe nail painting. I think it will be great for her.

Her going away for a girls weekend means we get to have a guys weekend at home. Palmer and I will get to hang out all weekend long. I'm really looking forward to it. I think Kim is looking forward to it, too.

We've read most of the book Babyproofing Your Marriage. In the book is suggests that the mom take off every now and then and leave the dad at home with the baby for the weekend. They have some term for it that has a negative connotation, like it's punishment for a dad to have to be a parent. I think they call it a Training Weekend. I am all for the Training Weekend.

I think it's good for everyone involved: mom, dad, and baby. Kim will get some much needed rest. I will get to experience a small sampling of what Kim goes through when I am at work. Palmer will get to see that he can survive without mommy for a few days, hopefully.

I think Kim going away will be good for me especially because I will get to do everything on my own: feeding, changing, bathing, entertaining, crisis avoidance, etc.. I really don't mind it. It's what I signed up for. And, I'm not just talking about this weekend. This is the stuff I signed up for when I decided to become a dad.

Wish us luck.

Labels: family

'ello mum, [I imagine that if Palmer could talk, he'd have an Irish accent.]

This morning, the tall one with the furry face told me that today is Valentine's day. He said that means that I'm supposed to tell you how much you mean to me. Well... that's kind of hard. Let's ignore for a moment the fact that I can't speak your language. Beyond that, it's hard to put into words how much you mean to me.

Let's see... you feed me, clean me, burp me, teach me, sing to me, play with me, read to me, cuddle me, snuggle me, and among other things you put up with my crap, literally. Yeah, without you, I'm pretty much helpless.

I'm sorry that I can't speak your language, yet. I'm trying to get better. You may have noticed that I practice all the time. Thanks for teaching me all those words. I hope that I can get them right soon.

I really want to talk to you. I want to tell you how great of a mom you are. I want to tell you how much I love you. I tried to tell the other one, but he doesn't understand me, either.

Speaking of him, I think you mean a lot to him, too. Not only do you take care of me, but you cook, you clean, you do laundry, and you're always making sure we're taken care of.

He's always telling me to be nice to you. He also tells me that he's proud of you. I'm not sure what that means, but I think he thinks you are doing a good job. I think he likes you.

I like you, too. You're the best mommy I could ever have.

Your favorite son,

palmer


p.s. What's a Valentine's Day?

Labels: family

Friday, I took the day off work and it was probably the best day of my life. I know that sounds a bit over dramatic, but it very well could have been. I stayed at home and spent all day with Kim and Palmer. We just hung out at the house. At one point our entire family took a nap. Palmer in his crib and Kim and I on the couch. It was beautiful.

It was the most Sabbath like day I can remember. Palmer was amazing. He was so chill it was scary. He ate when I wanted him to and he slept when I put him down for naps. Kim wondered what had happened to our son that she spends every day with. Between eating and sleeping Palmer played, laughed, and didn't fuss. He even took a crap without getting it all over his clothes.

Saturday morning I left to go skiing with six other guys1. We went up to Ski Beech, which is a little over three hours away. We skied from about one o'clock until nine o'clock. I was surprised that after six years or more away from the slopes, I still had it. Well, I "had it" as much as I ever had. I fell about three times: once after trying to go big off a jump2, once coming off a box, and once right after I sprayed Mike, who had just fallen. That last one was probably karma.

Sunday, we decided to not go skiing because of the weather. It was cold and windy, which makes it seems real cold. Instead, we went on a hike, sort of. We visited what one person described as a rock colony. It was a place in the river where the water flows downhill through hundreds of car sized rocks. We climbed the hill rock-by-rock and then descended by jumping from one rock to another. One of the guys called it an adult sized jungle gym.

After playing at the river, and almost getting hit by a falling branch on the walk back, we drove home. I got home around five and spent the rest of the night with the family. I got to feed Palmer and give him his customary bath before bed. Then, Kim and I capped off the weekend by catching up on some television. We curled up on the couch and watch an episode of The Biggest Loser.

It was a great three days filled with family time and time with some great guys.

1. back Barry, Matt, Rowe, Daniel, Mike and Jeramie


2. back Big is relative. I was probably going to get two feet off the ground, as compared to my previous one foot jump.

Labels: family, sports, travel

My wife hates to go bowling. Well, that's an overstatement. More aptly, my wife is not the biggest fan of going bowling. Ironically, her cousin likes to bowl so much that he does it for a living.

Chris, i.e. "C.J.", and Kim grew up together. They are only about a year apart in age. He has been bowling his whole life and bowling professionally since 2003. We've gotten to see him bowl on ESPN a few times, which is pretty cool.

This year, he has an awesome opportunity to participate in one of the biggest tournaments of the PBA season. It is sort of their "post-season" tournament. It's called the Motel 6 Roll to Riches. The Riches part is that there is a $150,000, winner take all prize. It features the winners of the four PBA major events and two other bowlers that are voted on by the fans.

This is where you come in. I need you all to go here and cast a vote for Chris Loschetter.

Thanks for the support.

Labels: family, sports

Here are a few new videos for your viewing pleasure, especially if you are a grandma.

Bathtime for Palmer


Playtime for Palmer

Labels: baby, family, video

Our son Palmer was born a month early, he due date was July 2, 2007, but he decided to make his appearance a little early. Honestly, it was a lot early; a whole month early. He was born on June 2, 2007. I'm not sure where he got the idea to be early from something. His parents are rarely early for anything, and we're usually not even on time, but late.

Palmer's early arrival meant that I got to celebrate Father's day in 2007. However, anyone that has ever had a child could tell you that mother's of two week olds are not really in the mood to celebrate father's of two week olds. Kim got me a card and a framed picture from Hallmark, but the gift she really wanted to give me would have to wait.

Over the past several months, my wife has worked diligently to make sure that all of Palmer's needs are met. His nutritional, developmental, and emotional needs. She is a trooper. I try to do my part, but she is there all day everyday. She's on the front lines of battling poopy diapers, incessant crying, and an ever hungry baby.

I don't want to paint an inaccurate picture because it is not all bad, or even mostly bad. She'd tell you that the good far out weighs the bad. There are days when you just can't get enough of him, but there are other days when you can't stand anymore of him. I guess that's called being a parent?!?

So, back on topic. So, Kim has been working really hard since Palmer was born, but when she has found time, she has been working on my Father's Day gift. She has always been creative, but for the most part, outside of coloring in coloring books with our nephew, she hasn't had a way to put that creativity to use. However, for Father's Day she wanted to create a scrapbook for me, documenting mine and Palmer's relationship.

It was her first attempt at scrap booking and she did awesome. The pages look really cool. The pictures look great with the text, and she added all these stickers on there that say things like "Top Pop". I wish there were a way to show it off on here. If you come by the house, I'll probably show it to you.

My wife is super. She is an amazing woman. Thanks for the scrapbook, dear.

Labels: books, family, indiscriminate

I saw an add for a movie called Jesus Camp on A&E over the weekend. So, I recorded it, and I watched it today.

The film was a documentary about a pastor named Becky Fisher and her summer camp, Kids on Fire. You can use google to find plenty of articles on the movie and the camp, which has been shut down by Fisher after she experienced some backlash from the film.

Fisher seems to believe that it is not just okay for Evangelicals to indoctrinate their children into Christianity, but that it is necessary. She gives the argument more than once that "other world religions are indoctrinating their children." So, Christians should as well.

We have a seven month old son and will most likely have a few more kids, and this is something that I struggle with. I feel that my wife and I have a duty to consistently model our believes to our children and that we should "bring them up in a Christian home", but I don't want to force my religion down their throats.

Do I want my kids to come to know and follow Jesus? Yes. However, I don't want it to be the case that, "Dad says we should do this. So, we better do it."

I want them to come to know that there is a God that loves them and cares for them despite their faults. I want them to know that this God desires for them to love him in return. That he desires that love from them so much that he came to this earth in the form of a man named Jesus. I want them to know that this Jesus lived a life that we should use as an example. And, that eventually this Jesus gave up is life and sacrificed more than we can imagine to make it possible for us to connect with God, now and forever. I want them to recognize the importance of this sacrifice, and I want them to see this as the reason that they should follow the example of Jesus' life. I want them to know that it will not always be easy, but that they are not alone. That in some way that is not easy to understand or explain, that this God is right there with them giving them promptings on how they should live.

I'm not sure how I get my child to see and believe all of that without force feeding him. I guess the first step is making sure that I stay on track and follow those promptings. Check back with me in twenty-five years and I'll let you know how it went.

Labels: church, entertainment, family, movies

Kim's family also does the whole draw a name and buy gifts for one person thing. The twist with her family is that everything revolves around a list. You must provide the family with a wish list. I struggle with this because it goes against my philosophy on gift giving, but I go along with it because I must.

Usually, it's hard for me to come up with a list of wants because everything that I don't have that I want costs several hundred dollars, e.g. a bike or a macbook.
This year I was able to come up with a few things. At the top of my list was money to fund drilling a well in Africa. My list also included a leaf blower, a set of pliers, a torque wrench, a black long sleeved thermal shirt, a shop vac, and The Dangerous Book for Boys.

Kristin, Kim's sister, drew my name. She got me the book and the torque wrench. The torque wrench will come in handy when I change my spark plugs this upcoming weekend. The book was a great gift because she addressed it to Palmer and I both. I hope that we do get to use it together.

That's all for now. Merry Christmas.

Labels: family, travel

Last night, my family exchanged "Christmas" gifts. Kim and I left this morning to head down to Florida for the weekend through Christmas day. So, we got together with my mom, my sisters, and everyone's spouses to do our part to perpetuate the commercialization of Christmas early.

I have a few hold ups with the whole gift giving at Christmas thing. It is not that I don't appreciate gifts. My main issue is that I don't want someone to buy me a gift out of a felt obligation or simply because it is Christmas. I abhor the idea of wish lists. If you don't know me well enough to know what to buy me, I'd rather you just not buy me anything, or you could give the money you would've spent on me to someone who needs it and just tell me about it.

My ideal gift receiving experience is one where the giver of the gift has a desire to show me love through the transfer of material things. This person would buy me a gift based on their knowledge of me and my likes, dislikes, wants, and needs.

I was a bit skeptical going into last night because I was unsure who had my name, (We draw names and buy for one person.) and no one had called Kim to get ideas. So, I assumed I was going to get some "stuff" that I didn't need. However, my expectations were thoroughly exceeded.

My little sister, Leslie, had my name, and she got me some awesome gifts. It was heartwarming (I wanted to use another word here, but I couldn't come up with a better one. My mind is numb from the ten hour drive that took almost thirteen hours.). She got me took books on Africa: 28 Stories Of AIDS in Africa and The Fate of Africa.

I haven't mentioned much about this on here, but until recently, I was preparing to go on a trip to the Central African Republic in January, but that fell through. Well, Leslie went and found out what language they speak there, French and Sangho, and went looking for a learn the language program for me. She couldn't find one for Sangho, which she was pretty disappointed about. So, after she couldn't get me that, she went with the other two books.

I'm really happy with her gifts. It was an awesome feeling that she was so thoughtful in her gifts. People say "It's the thought that counts", but to me I think it's really true. Thanks sis!

Labels: family

My mom and dad were married, had two kids, and had gotten divorced before I could remember anything. A few years later, my mom remarried. For the rest of my life, my stepfather became my dad, and my "dad" stepped into the role of Bobby.

For as long as I can remember, Bobby and I have had an interesting relationship. He has been more of an older friend than a parent. Sort of a guy twenty years older than me that I just happen to know. We've done lot of cool things together most of which have something to do with sports. We've been to Atlanta to see the Braves play a few times and we've been to see the Carolina Panthers play a few times.

Well, this past weekend we renewed our do things related to sports tradition, and he and Brian, my brother, came to the NCSU vs Maryland football game. Kim and I go to all the home State games, and one of our friends had some extra tickets to our final game of the 2007 season, so I invited Bobby to come out with us.

As always, we got to the parking lot a few hours before game time for some tailgating. Just like any good tailgate, this one was filled with food, football tossing, and cornhole.

Trying to be inclusive, I invited Bobby to throw football with us. At some point, it hit me that this was the first time in my nearly twenty-eight years of life that I had ever thrown a football with this man, who had a part in my creation. Bobby is definitely the source of my height and my athleticism. He played several sports in high school, and by what I understand, he went on to play some sport in college.

After the game, we were walking back to the car, and we got to talking about playing sports. We're both "has beens", and that's what "has beens" do. We talked about playing sports in high school, and he said something that hit home with me. He said, "Yeah, I played basketball, baseball, and football in high school. i ran track on the weekends, and I even got talked into wrestling one season, but if I could do it all over again, I would just pick one. I was good at everything, but never great at anything." I bet I've said that a thousand times.

Since then, I can't help thinking about how little I know about him. I've also been thinking about how little I know about my mom. These two people somehow met, got married, had two kids, got divorced, all before they were twenty-two, and I know next to nothing about how all that happened. It just hit me that I am quickly approaching thirty, and I don't know very much at all about the lives of my parents when they were my age or younger.

i'm making it my goal that over the next year, I am going to learn my parents' stories.

Do you know who your parents are? Better yet, do you know who they were?

Labels: family, sports

Kim and I wrapped up year three yesterday. We didn't waste any time. We jumped right into year four this morning.

I thought I would take a walk down memory lane and recap the previous year's highlights. (This is kind of all over the place.)

Near the end of year two, we bought a house^, started a church plant^, and found out we were going to have a baby^. So, needless to say, year three started off with us in transition.

The beginning of year three found us, thankfully, at the end of a horrendous NC State football season. Though the football games were bad, the company was always good. We have some incredible friends^ and we spend several Saturdays during the fall rejoicing in and suffering through the ups and downs of the roller coaster that is being an NC State fan. The transition continued as NC State decided to replace their football coach, which left us all with dreams of better days to come.

December brought more change as our fledgling home group combined forces with another home group to form a single group where we would combine our forces like Voltron. The merge gave us an opportunity to work closely with some really good friends in our attempt to become better learners, lovers, and givers. Though frustrating at times, this year has been great as Kim and I have journeyed together and with our home group trying to find our place in God's story, discover our gifts, and put them to use serving others.

December also brought our friends, the Smiths, into our neighborhood. They purchased a home about three tenths of a mile from ours. I have really enjoyed growing closer to them through out this year. They too found out they were going to have a baby shortly after moving into their home. It has been incredible seeing Kim and Mandy's friendship deepen as they both tried to figure out how to be a pregnant woman and now as they both try to figure out how to be moms. Daniel and I ride to work together and talk about building stuff and sports. That's deepening our relationship, right?

In January, we gained a roommate. John moved in with us while he counted down the days until his wedding. He was an excellent roommate. He never really was an inconvenience, except for that time that he woke us up with his screaming and had his EMT friends over at three o'clock in the morning. Having someone else live in your house makes you evaluate how you treat one another. I was pleased that for the most part Kim and I were able to be the same way with John there as without him there. He would tell you that he thinks we treat each other great, which I would agree with. He's probably lucky that he only woke us up with his screaming once. We've learned with having a baby that getting woken up consistently by another person screaming at three o'clock in the morning can make for some necessary apologies later in the day.

February, March, April, and May went by in a blur. I turned twenty-seven. Kim turned twenty-eight. John got married and moved out. Kim took a trip on a train for the first time. I played flag football in the Carolina Panthers Stadium. Kim's belly grew bigger and bigger, and we took classes to learn how to birth.

June... June rocked our world. A few years ago we went to Florida with a Mustang and came back with an Escape. This time, we took a trip to Florida to gain a brother-in-law and we came back with a human. Palmer Hayes Smith, due on July 2, came an entire month early on June 2. Having a baby a month early and in a different state was not a subject that they covered in the Preparing for Child Birth classes. So, there we were "parents".

We found blessing in a odd place. Palmer was kept in the NICU for a week after he was born. Normally, this is not a good thing. However, for us, our child was not high risk. Though it was stressful and scary at times, it was a week where we got to learn how to feed, change, and care for our son under the guidance of the extremely kind and helpful nursing staff.

June brought another couple into our neighborhood, and eventually into our home group. Jeramie and I have been friends for decades, and that's heard to do when you are only 27. So, it is great to have him and Joye so close.

The following months were full of sleepless nights, dirty diapers, and trips to the doctors office. But they were also filled will helping hands from friends and family, smiles, coos, and a million pictures. Somewhere in the midst of the baby stuff, we did take a trip to Florida for Kim's ten year high school reunion and we took a trip to the mid-west for a funeral and to visit friends.

This year has had its fair share of additions to our community, but the map is filling up with places to visit as our friends move away to explore new paths in their lives. In August, we packed up Jon and Meredith and sent them off to Philadelphia for law school.

It has been quite the year. In the grand scheme of things, three years doesn't sound like that long, but looking back it seems like a lot has happened in those three short years. Kim and I have an awesome relationship. I feel very blessed to have her as my wife, my mate, and especially as my friend. People say that the first year of marriage is always the hardest. Well, the first year for Kim and I was a breeze. I can say without a doubt that this past year was the hardest of our three. However, it was also the greatest year, not just of our marriage, but also of my life.

Thank you God for blessing me with such a wonderful wife, a beautiful son, a great family and better friends than I could ever ask for. Amen.

Labels: family

I started this post on Saturday, but I ended up not finishing it then, and I didn't want to cut it short. It does not follow my short post rules, but rules were made to be broken, right?

Today is my wife's birthday. I'm not real big on cards. So, I thought I would post on here what my card might say if I were to buy one.

It would definitely have an I love you or two in there. There are a lot of things that I love about Kim. The thing that I would probably put at the top of the list is her friendship. I'll focus on her friendship towards me1, but I feel like she is a good friend to lots of people.

Here's a little background... Kim and I met in Kissimmee, FL at Longhorn Steakhouse. She had worked there since she was born, or if not that long, close to it. I was hired in the summer of 2001. I can remember the first time I saw Kim. It was right after I was hired. She was walking into work, having just come from her other job at the courthouse2. The first thing I noticed was her charming personality and great sense of humor. Of course, that's a lie. I saw her and thought, "She's cute. I'm gonna like working here."3

Given that I was an attractive, intelligent, funny, available4, young man I was sure that she wanted to get to know me, even if she wasn't aware of it, yet. So, I made it a point to find a way to get to talk to her. We started talking at work a lot. Then, we started talking outside of work. We would talk in the parking at work for hours. We talked at TGIFridays. We talked while sitting on the picnic table at my apartment complex. We talked a lot.

It was a couple months later that we realized that we spent pretty much every day together, and we had our DTR and decided to use the whole "boyfriend-girlfriend" labeling.


I think the beginning of our relationship was incredible. There was none of the oh-my-gosh-I've-got-to-impress-[her|him] stuff. We weren't looking for a soul mate, or any kind of mate for that matter. So, we didn't find one.